The one where I talk about weight

Last year I started working out. (Remember this post?) I did really well for about 2 months. I didn't work out every day, but I averaged about 5 days a week. Not too shabby for someone that hates exercise!

Then I weighed myself.

There's a reason why I don't own a scale. I hadn't lost a single solitary pound. Not one. Not even half a pound. Nothing. Nada. After all my hard work I was still the exact same weight I was when I started. I was crushed. I tried to blow it off and say "Oh, but my jeans fit better and that's all that matters." I didn't believe it. I wanted to have lost weight. Not a lot, just a few pounds.

So, I stopped working out. I figured what was the point? If I wasn't going to lose any weight than why should I even bother? If I wasn't losing any weight, why couldn't I just sit on the couch and eat cake? That's what I'd rather be doing, not sweating and grunting and feeling sore.

Then I started thinking about what my weight REALLY means. Is the number on the scale that important? I'm 5' 1" tall and at my thinnest I was 130 lbs. After 2 kids, I'm stuck at 150 lbs. I can't seem to get below that weight. According to the research I've done, that means that I'm obese. My jaw hit the floor when I saw that. Obese? I know I'm a little...jiggly, but obese? I mean really? Obese? What the hell?! I started feeling really depressed. Then and there I decided that I wasn't going to let the number on the scale determine who I was or how I felt about myself.

I knew that when I was working out that I felt better. I knew that I was losing inches because I had to wear a belt to keep my jeans from falling off. For the first time in years, I actually had muscles! So, I decided to start working out again. In turn, I'm making healthier food choices.

I have no idea if I've lost weight, and this time around I truly don't care. I'm focused on the way I look and the way I feel, not a number on the scale. My genes have predetermined that I'm never going to be stick thin. I'm always going to have curves. I love my curves! They're what attracted Ben to me in the first place. Why would I want to get rid of them?

I'm slowly learning to embrace the body that God has given me. I might be 150 lbs, but I'm determined to make that 150 lbs look good!

Toot Toot!

I rarely toot my own horn, mostly because I don't really ever do anything worthy of it, but today I am. About three weeks ago I started The 30 Day Shred by Jillian Michaels. If you've ever watched The Biggest Loser you know that Jillian is no joke. If you know me, you should know that I hate exercise. Hate it. With a passion. I'd rather do just about anything than exercise. A month or so ago I decided that it was time to start doing something. I was feeling blah and very overweight and unhealthy. I've been hearing about the 30 Day Shred and decided that I could do it. It's only 20 minutes. I mean, I can do just about anything for 20 minutes, right?
The first day was rough. I almost passed out afterward and couldn't walk. The second day was worse. I actually had to take an Aleve so I could walk! But, I kept on. Day by day it got a little easier. I can say that I've noticed a big difference just in the three short weeks I've been doing it. Today when I got dressed I realized that, for the first time in a long time, my breasts are bigger than my stomach! Hooray! Last night Ben commented that was looking a lot thinner. Yay for me!!! So, just this once, I'll toot my own horn :D

*****TOOT TOOT******